Month: January 2014

The loneliness of the long-distance travel writer

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It sounds ungrateful.

A PR company, tourist board or tour operator flies you to an overseas location. They put you up in a smart, often recently opened hotel. They may arrange free passes for attractions and provide a guide to show you around the best sites.

Sometimes they even leave a little gift pack in your room with some chocolates to take home as gifts and a bottle of some obscure local firewater to strip the lounge of its paintwork.

They expect little in return. Just some words and a link to their website in a fact box under the story. And, if it’s not actually a proper story, then that’s okay.

A lot of them don’t read it anyway.

So what’s the catch?

It’s a tricky one. The loneliness of the long-distance travel writer is hard to quantify.

I think it’s a feeling of dislocation from the real world, a bubble existence without normal rules or conditions, a slow-creeping weariness with the very thing that once inspired you.

Being away is a transient, ethereal experience. You find yourself in a new place, or a new district of a place you half recognise. You briefly meet people who welcome you like a new friend, then forget your very existence within five minutes of leaving.

You spend a lot of time alone. Whether sitting in a hotel bar, pretending to be engrossed in your emails, or eating dinner alone in a restaurant, surrounded by uncomfortable glances and feigning an important air while taking notes.

I used to embrace the otherworldliness of it.

I would retreat from the real world to my too-big-for-one suite in the city’s latest boutique hotel and gaze pensively out the window, clearing head space with views across a rain-lashed Northern European landscape.

I liked just being ‘away’. But age and children have shifted the parameters.

I’ve grown tired of arriving in off season to an up-and-coming region still waiting to come up, bored of workmen still fixing fittings in my room at the ironically hip new hotel as I check in, and weary of the prospect of another dinner a un with an elaborate six-course tasting menu and a swarthy waiter with a pitying look in his eye.

Not even the accompanying multiple glasses of carefully selected wines from the extensive New World list can numb the feeling that my assignment has turned into a cruel parody of travel-scribe clichés.

After dinner I sometimes venture out alone, gasping for non-air-conditioned breath, to consult the handy free map. I draw my self-important conclusions about the latest trendy pop-up bar in a previously derelict warehouse in a district that was, probably just a matter of hours ago, a complete no-go-zone.

In essence I have fallen out of love with what Dylan Thomas would recognise as “my craft or sullen art.”

I still go away, although less these days and on far more judiciously chosen assignments. I often take the girls with me and increasingly delight in lights out by 9pm after a couple of chapters of Fantastic Mr Fox.

I still love finding the best angle on the story, the craft of placing the perfect, essence-capturing quote at the perfect about-turn juncture of the feature.

But, for now, the loneliness of the long-distance travel writer engulfs me.

Theroux would scoff as he set off for nine months in Nepal. The teen bloggers would trample me in the stampede for the free peanuts in the airport lounge. And the retired hacks would roll their eyes as they opened their invitation to supper at the Captain’s Table.

Maybe one day I’ll join them. Or maybe I’ll try to re-invent my sullen art for a new era.

Either way, they would all probably think me a whining, ungrateful bastard. And they would all probably be right.

 Can you relate to the ideas in this post? Post your comments below.

Story of the week: Fright night in Turku, Finland

satan* We’re delving back into the distant archives this week for a mid-winter trip to Finland and an encounter with a non-mainstream attraction. 

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It’s midnight and minus three on the deserted streets of Finland’s oldest city as we hit town in need of thermal underwear and strong liquor.

Generally nothing much happens in Turku in winter. That is, apart from some heavy duty drug abuse and the midday speech by the local mayor, which is broadcast on Christmas Day by Finnish television.

But tonight – and for one night only – the kids from Turku are in for a treat.

Freak show

Finland’s leading freakshow circus, Mundus Absurdus, are about to take to the stage at a top Turku nightspot. The circus has been performing together for three years at various rock and fetish festivals around Finland. Tonight they’re sandwiched between showcases sets by two of Finland’s leading death metal bands.

The guys all met through a mutual interest in the tattoo and piercing scene and came together to produce a show which mixes new circus skills with traditional freakshow elements, such as the bed of nails, hammering nails into your nose and fire breathing.

On stage they’re part Slipknot, part Hammer House of Horror, drawing on both Jim Rose and traditional Russian circus.

The set revolves around four main members, two dressed as devils and two as clowns. Each member is self-taught and has their own speciality from jumping on broken glass to needles.

“On stage we don’t feel any pain as we’re so pumped up on adrenaline and endorphins,” explains fireater Antti Kervinen [pictured above], who beat his own Guinness Book of Records entry in August 2001 when he ate 54 flaming torches in one minute.

“It’s only after the show, when we start to come down to earth, we count the injuries.”

Live action 

On stage that night, all goes smoothly with Lassi Lindqvist smiling demonically as he swings two large milk crates from his nipples. The sound of the audience wincing fills the room.

“Breathing fire is the most dangerous stunt because, if you get the flame in your lungs, then you’ve only got two minutes for someone to give you a tracheotomy before your lungs collapse and you suffocate,” says Lassi.

“Our audience are like peeping toms,” he adds. “The people who come to see us harbour a dark need to see what we do, but the would never dare do it themselves. We’re like their scapegoats.”

As the show reaches its fire-breathing crescendo, and top Finnish metallers Maj Karman Kanniit Kuvat tune up backs stage, the crowd goes wild.

“Everyone thinks they can do the stunts but we’re doing this for real – no protection, no faking it”, smiles Lassi after the show.

“Of course I get a rush from doing this like no other stimulant. It hurts like hell but feels great too,” he smiles.

“But, if I stub my toe at home, I’m like a baby,” he adds.

“Really, I’m just a big wuss.”

This story was first published in the Bizarre magazine in January 2002. Liked this? Try also Last Tango in Finland. 

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A winter warmer at Rotterdam’s best cafe

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* I’ve been away in Rotterdam for my first assignment of the year. I’ll be posting some personal asides from the commissions during these trips. This is the first.

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I met an old friend again last week.

It’s been a few years since I was last in Rotterdam but they hadn’t aged a day.

Dudok, my favourite Rotterdam café, is buzzing with the gentle hum of chatter and the delicate clink of coffee cups – even at 4pm on a wintery Monday.

Located in the central-north Laurenskwartier, Dudok is named after the architect Willem Dudok, who designed the imposing building with its Art Deco-style facade [pictured above].

Inside, three giant photos of local businesses and a cast-iron, retro clock above the door dominate the high-ceilinged room.

I pull up a chair at the central reading table and peruse the rack of magazines, choosing between an Arcade Fire interview in Oor magazine and Trent Reznor on Johnny Cash in the latest copy of Electronic Beats.

Across the way, a group of ladies at leisure are tucking into the high tea of sandwiches and patisserie.

Nearer me, several bearded, intellectual types are stroking their chins while pouring over the politics sections of the daily newspapers.

At the other end of the reading table, a multiple-pierced student looks to be finishing her college assignment while riding the free Wi-Fi.

As dark clouds gather outside over the tram-lined boulevards, I happily work my way along the shelf of Euro pop-culture magazines over cups of milky coffee.

But, also, I love the traditional Dutch apple pie, served warm with cinnamon ice cream. The mix of crumbly pastry and soft filling, tinged with cinnamon and spiced with plump raisons, is as classy as I remember it.

The food even comes with a little edible label: “Dudok original.”

For a traveller alone in the city, Dudok feels like home.

Do you have a favourite bolt hole in Rotterdam? Or can you recommend another place-visit place in Holland? Post below.

Gazetteer

Dudok

Rotterdam tourism

Visit Holland

Story of the week: World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland

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* The World Economic Forum opens in snowy Davos this week. Here’s an old piece – pre Leveson – about the annual CEO shindig. 

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Brace yourself Switzerland.

The 13,000-strong Alpine resort of Davos-Klosters will host the World Economic Forum this week.

Based around the theme, Shaping the Post-Crisis World, the event will bring together some 2,500 of the world’s brainiest eggheads, including 1,500 senior business executives from around the world, 200 government representatives, 30 or so leaders of international NGOs and, crucially for a frisson of paparazzi fervour, 20 so-called ‘cultural leaders’.

Klaus Schwab, then Professor of Business Policy at the University of Geneva, now the Forum’s Executive Chairman, founded the Forum in 1971 in Davos, Europe’s highest-altitude town.

The snow-shrouded Swiss mountains have offered a winter-wonderland backdrop to the event ever since with landmark encounters at the Forum including the 1992 meeting between South African President F.W. de Klerk and Nelson Mandela.

So, to celebrate this year’s Forum, we ask, “From blue skies thinking to blue skies playing. Which kind of Davos player are you?”

Rupert Murdoch

Murdoch will be one of the co-chairs of the 2009 event and will doubtless find this Alpine enclave the ideal hideaway to plan his next move towards world domination.

Better still, the 77-year-old newspaper baron is in good company with the resort inspiring a tradition of literary greats: Robert Louis Stevenson finished Treasure Island while convalescing here in 1881; Sir Arthur Conan Doyle penned a few Sherlock Holmes tales and found time to lay out Davos’ first golf course.

But it’s the German novelist Thomas Mann who is most closely associated with Davos-Klosters. His Davos novel, The Magic Mountain, was first published in 1924.

Media players can take some time out from the Davos Congress Centre to walk the new Thomas Mann Path through the mountains.

Of course, any self-regarding Australian trend setter wouldn’t be caught dead in one of the resort’s mere hotels. Strewth, mate.

So Mr. Murdoch may be interested to learn that Descent, the luxury chalet company, has a new, über-luxurious property in Davos-Klosters. Tivoli Lodge is a design-led, fiercely discrete chalet, just a two-minute drive – chauffeured, ‘natch – from the centre of Davos Dorf.

It boasts a home cinema and a study, from where to taunt cowering editors about their front-page splash. Afterwards, make a splash yourself in the spa complex with its hot tub and indoor pool.

Finally, round off another power-brokering evening with your co-chairmen at Hubli’s Landhaus, a Michelin-starred restaurant in the tiny village of Laret, just outside Davos.

Expect great local fish and game, served amid a high-powered ambiance.

Bono

The Forum has courted a more rock’n’roll vibe in recent years with the likes of Bono, the larger-than-life U2 frontman, who seamlessly blends philanthropy with lobbying, a high-profile former attendee.

Away from the deal-sealing meetings, Davos-Klosters is perfect for some adrenaline-pumping high jinx of rock star-esque proportions. With 54 ski lifts, 320km of slopes and 75km of cross-country ski tracks, located at altitudes between 1,124 and 2,844m, the six Davos-Klosters ski areas are a winter sports Mecca.

The Jakobshorn slope is the in place for snowboarders with its half-pipe and monster pipe constructions, while the municipality of Wiesen is home to a 1500m sq open-air ice rink, the venue for a spot of ice-stick shooting, an Alpine take on curling.

Alternatively, join a Ride-the-Night-on-Snow event with full-throttle night skiing on the Parsenn slopes.

Given the peripatetic life on the road, even an international jet-setter likes a bit of home comfort sometimes and Chesa Grischuna, an elegant, frescoed, chalet-style hotel in the centre of Klosters, offers them – and then some.

Combining local wood carving with modern amenities, the cosy Sali lounge can be turned into a VIP area for a wannabe rock god to hold court about saving the planet.

Later that night, invite a select group of business groupies to join up for some high-altitude fine dining at Bruhin’s Weissfluhgipfel, a restaurant located at the highest point in Davos-Klosters –that’s 2,864m, since you ask – before moving on to Davos Platz for late-night drinks and a bawdy karaoke version of With or Without You.

Cabanna Club, Cava Grischa at the Hotel Europe and Ex-Bar are the in places and stay open until late.

Angelina Jolie

The Forum loves a sprinkle of Tinseltown stardust and Angelina brought it in spades a few years back.

For the international humanitarian who skips from red carpet to UNICEF refugee camp in one dainty turn of Jimmy Choos, accommodation has to be both holistic as well as glamorous.

Step forward then the new Iglo Village. Located on the Davos Parsenn ski slopes, its 17 separate igloos are built for discrete privacy yet offer international hotel-style services when you emerge from your pod.

The Romantic Plus igloo, ideal for a sub-zero tryst with Brad Pitt, offers a guided nighttime snowshoe trek followed by a gourmet fondue dinner before retiring to your igloo for a dip in the heated whirlpool bath.

Many of the A-List-hangout eateries around the resort can get a bit sniffy about arriving en famille with your brood of sprogs adopted from various Southeast Asian countries.

One place that combines great food with family-friendly service, however, is the art-deco restaurant Flüela-Stübli at the Hotel Flüela. Melt-in-the-mouth veal dishes for the ‘rentals, special menus for the kids and quality time Hollywood style for the whole family.

The holistic approach also extends to Davos-Klosters’ biggest draw away from the slopes: wellness.

Davos first came to prominence in the 1860s when Dr Alexander Spengler championed the clean mountain air for convalescing tuberculosis sufferers.

Today there are around 500 clinics in Davos-Klosters alone, so after a hard day of pressing the flesh at the Forum, it’s time to indulge in some serious pampering.

The original Wald Sanatorium, dating from 1911, is now the slick Waldhotel Davos. Located in a peaceful location on the edge of a forest, it boasts an indoor saltwater grotto and lymph drainage therapy.

Drain away then wear the contents in a vial around your neck afterwards – that’ll impress the bankers.

Mervyn King

British captains of industry, like our very own Governor of the Bank of England, are in a tight spot.

With the British economy going down the pan, Mervyn King can’t be seen to be flogging his expenses account too hard. But how can a financier with a taste for the good life do Davos on a budget and still keep up with the Euro-Jones’?

Well, Davos-Klosters does have some budget-conscious accommodation. The Allod Park Apartments in Davos Platz offer simple but centrally located serviced suites from £375 a week for two bedrooms.

You can even order fresh bread rolls to be delivered each morning. Hearty but good-value food is also available at the local stübli, rustic Alpine eateries for high-carb, low-priced food. One of the best is Walserhuus Sertig, a family-run restaurant with venison and meat fondues from £6 per person.

Going on the piste can be a pricey affair – budget £34 for a one-day ski pass, plus around £20 for ski and boot hire.

So better arm yourself with a stout pair of shoes and experience the perfect still of the Davos-Klosters mountains by following the resort’s 84km of pristine snow-shoe trails.

The après-ski action could push the most prudent of banker into their own mini credit crunch, so instead of joining the beautiful people at Audi’s Graströchni on red piste 21, head over to the Monstein Brewery, the highest brewery in Europe. The Brewer’s Aperitif tour costs £19 and ends with a drink-your-fill, hic, tasting session.

Finally, if it all gets too much, throw caution to the sub-prime wind and place your last Swiss Franc on black 17.

The casino in Davos is open until late and the drinks are cheap.

Gazetteer

Davos-Klosters Tourism

World Economic Forum 

This story was first published in the Voyager magazine in January 2009. Liked this? Try also Riding the Post Bus in Switzerland. 

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